Diary of a Jumoke: Episode VI

This is the 6th Episode of Abdulwahab Olajumoke’s “Diary of a Jumoke”. This episode is a quick read. Read and let me know your thoughts in the comment section below.




The look on Shade’s face was priceless when she entered the living room and found Dapo Badejo sitting right there. She had been sleeping when I arrived.

After staring at him for what seems like ages at the door, I finally invited him in and he was sitting comfortably on my favorite couch. I wanted to ask him like a million questions. One of which was how he got to know where I was living. Noka’s issue was laid to rest for a while as the anger I was feeling earlier had dissolved into something I couldn’t understand.

“Dapo, this is my mumI introduced.

I was actually expecting him to do a casual “Good Morning Ma”

But to my surprise, he dropped his phone and did a full Yoruba greeting by prostrating. I couldn’t help but laugh.

Ekaaro Mummy” [Good morning ma] he greeted.

Kaaro oko mi” [Morning my dear] my mum replied with a wide smile and a face that showed she was making up funny ideas.

“I hope she won’t start one of her long marriage lectures later” I thought.

“Jumoke, I’ll be in the room” Mum said and left, giving me and Dapo privacy.

“Erm, how did you locate me” I asked, not knowing what else to say.

“I have a friend living close by”

“And I was visiting”

“I was on my way out when I saw you”

“You were still wearing the same cloth from yesterday, so it wasn’t so hard recognizing you” he pointed with a mischievous grin.

I shifted on my seat. His remark about me still wearing the cloth from yesterday made me slightly uncomfortable. I studied his face from the corner of my eyes. He had a plump round face and I couldn’t help but notice his pink lips. I was fighting the urge to grab and kiss it.

We chatted for a while after he caught me staring at him and I covered up my embarrassment by offering him a glass of fruit juice.

He was fun to talk with and we chatted as though we’ve been friends for a very long time.

“I think I should be on my way now” he said out of the blues.

“I have to be in Abuja by noon” he added.

I gave a curtly nod and smiled nervously. His presence was somehow giving me goose bumps. I didn’t know if it was because of the fact that he was a celebrity or because I was crushing head over heels on him.

I followed him all the way to the gate like a lost puppy.

“What on earth is wrong with you Adejumoke!” I asked myself silently and gave myself a mild knock.

I was really acting out around this guy.

He asked if we could exchange contacts and I gave him my phone number while he did the same.

“See you soon Barbie” he said jovially as he brought his car engine to life and zoomed off.

I found myself fantasizing on how to nail him the next time we meet. His cute pink lip was just too sexy to ignore.


The loud buzz of my phone woke me up. I had crashed in Shade’s room immediately Dapo left. I picked the phone to check who was calling but I couldn’t recognize the number. I rubbed my eyes sleepily and I was about to continue my peaceful sleep when the phone rang again.

“Hi, who goes there??” I said into the phone, slightly irritated.

I really hated being disturbed when I sleep.

“Omalicha my pretty baby”

“How are you dear?” the caller asked.

I was lost for a while.

“Who is this alien calling my phone?” I thought.

Then my brain booted and I picked the Igbo accent. I had totally forgotten about this gaped tooth man. Chief Ike or whatever his name was.

But wait, I didn’t remember giving him my contact.

“Hello Chief, good afternoon”

“I hope you are okay?” I asked.

Few seconds passed without him saying a word, he seemed to be struggling with what to say.

“Biko, Ada send me your account number, let me furnish it” he said finally.

I busted out in laughter. Did he just say he wanted to furnish my account??

Is that even English at all??

“I want to make you happy baby” he added.

“I’ll send it very soon Chief. Thanks for the kind gesture”.

“You are always welcomed Omalicha

“Biko keep that face smiling” he replied and the line went dead.

This man should stop calling me these silly Igbo names abegi. I thought I told him my name. If he wanted to furnish my whole life I’ll let him. It is not kuku my money.

Meanwhile, Freddy had been calling me ever since. It seemed he was craving for a delicacy from the honey pot; nothing good comes easy though. I won’t just throw myself at him like a cheap girl. He would have to beg me with something big. A new car would do or maybe a trip out of the country. I yawned lazily and sat up in bed. Mr Ibu or was it Chief Ike had disturbed my journey to dreamland.

I was about stepping into the kitchen when I heard the doorbell.

I walked lazily towards the door and answered it before the bell rang the second time. Standing at the door was Mike’s chauffeur and a lady who I couldn’t recognize.

She was holding the most beautiful evening gown I had ever seen in my life.

“Good day madam. Oga talk say make we deliver this gown to you

Him also talk say make you get ready by 6pm”

“I go come carry you” he said.

I couldn’t help but admire his Warri inspired Pidgin.

“Dude must be from the creeks” I thought while I gestured to the lady to hand over the gown.

I had to think of a way to steal out of the house without my mum’s knowledge. I don’t want her asking questions about where I was going.



*abegi – please

*kuku – none

*Omalicha – sweetheart

*Oga – boss


Diary of a Jumoke: Episode V

Thank God it is Saturday. I love the Lagos weather today. So sunny and nice. So here is a lovely post to go with the lovely weather. This is the 5th Episode of Abdulwahab Olajumoke’s “Diary of a Jumoke”. Read and let me know your thoughts in the comment section below.


*Five Years Ago*

“Babe I really miss you and I want you so bad”

“Noka I miss you too. But I really need to talk to you. I answered in a very tired voice.

I had been feeling funny for the past one week. I wake up almost every day with a dizzy spell. That morning I had decided to confirm my fears by having a urine test.

The result I got threw me off balance. I discovered that I was pregnant. My mind was in deep turmoil.

What was I going to do?

I was so confused that I called my boyfriend Noka to tell him that I was pregnant. But when he picked the call and I heard his fruity voice at the other end of the phone, the words got stuck in my mouth.

All I could manage to tell him was that we needed to talk very urgently. He agreed and promised to pay me a visit the following weekend.

Noka was a guy I met when I traveled to Abuja to visit an uncle. He was in his mid-twenties and a bit older than I was. He was handsome, light skinned, with a tawny physique and an impressive athletic feature.

We met at the cinema, started talking and we ended up making love on our second date. Since then we had been sweethearts. I fell madly in love with him.

We met during his NYSC and he was stationed at Abuja. He didn’t go into much detail about his life, but he told me that his father was an Urhobo man and his mother an American.

He said they both live outside the country but they come to Nigeria occasionally. He also told me that he was likely to travel out of the country too, after his youth service. He had promised heaven and earth and I was so gullible then that I believed he was my knight in shining armor.

As he had promised, he arrived in my school that weekend. We had fun, went to the pool to swim and we ended up lodging at a hotel later that night.

I was still a bit scared. I didn’t know how to relate the news to him. So we had slept that night with me holding the news till the next day.

We had an early breakfast the following morning because he was leaving as early as possible.

I couldn’t eat.

The rice we had ordered smelled like raw egg and all I wanted to do was throw up. He noticed my clumsiness but I told him I was feeling a bit feverish.

He was all set to go and he drew me up from where I was sitting and enveloped me in a tight hug while he planted wet kisses on my face.

“I’ll miss you sugar bush he had said in a modulated voice.

I knew I had to tell him now or I’ll never be able to tell him again.

“Noka, I have something to tell you”

“I am pregnant” I finally said in a quivering voice.

The smile on his face disappeared.

“Jummy, you are what?” he had asked in a very worried tone.

At that moment, I wished the ground would open and swallow me up.

“How? When?” He asked.

“What are you going to do about it?”

I couldn’t believe my ears.

“I can’t abort it. I am scared” I answered.

He dropped my hand instantly.

“Jumoke, I don’t have time for this” he had said in a shrilled voice that sent shivers down my spine.

Before I could say more, he bolted out of the room, leaving me all by myself.

That was the last time I saw him – the last time I heard from him. He had walked away from my life, leaving me to bear the burden myself.

My mother was devastated when she heard the news. We had both cried our eyes out. She expected more from me and I had disappointed her.

My Father died when I was just ten years old and since then she has been trying her possible best to give me a good education.

We were not rich, but she had always given me full financial support with her petty trade. I had dreams also. I had an ambition.

I was going to be an Economist; a very successful one. And I was so close to realizing that dream. I was in my 200L in school already. And now the pregnancy was threatening to shatter my dreams.

I had resolved to make the best out of my predicament. I was going to pull through no matter what it takes.

Few months after I gave birth to my baby, my mother’s shop was razed to the ground. Not a single thing remained.

Things began to fall apart. I had to man up and take up the responsibility of feeding myself, my mother and my 5 months old baby.

So in my 300L, I joined the clique of call girls in school. Don’t blame me, I had no other choice or else I’ll just drown in poverty.

Money began to roll in from all angles and by the time I was on my youth service, I had bought a house for my mother and my child.

The life I was leaving was tempting though so I had continued my “business” after university and stopping was the last thing on my mind. I had promised myself that I would be independent and I would never let any man take advantage of me again.



I was still busy cuddling my daughter when my mother appeared from my room.

The shock on my face was evident.

“Maami e kaaro” [Mom, good morning] I greeted not knowing what else to say. I had not seen her and my daughter for the past 8 months.

She looked different, a bit older.

She walked towards the couch and answered my greeting with a nod. I knew I was in for trouble because she looked upset.

“Ma, why didn’t you call me before coming? I could have come over to pick you” I added knowing fully that last statement was a big lie. If she had called, I would have lied about being out of town or busy.

She sat on the couch without answering. I sensed something fishy was going on so I told Arianna to go inside my room.

Maami ki lo sele?” [Mom what happened?] I inquired.

“Why are you doing this to your daughter?”

“You left her all these past months without a single visit”

“What kind of mother are you!?” she thundered.

I felt a rush of emotions as she spoke and I was trying hard not to cry. I knew I had neglected my daughter, but I had my reasons. I was working my head off to give her a good life. I had been so busy.

“She was pulling tantrums”

“She wanted to see you badly”

“So I had no other choice but to bring her here”.

“And after what happened yesterday, she started asking questions”

I was alarmed.

“What happened?” I inquired in a worried tone.

My mum sighted heavily and shifted on her sit.


 Wait! She just called my name in full. Whenever she does that some serious banters was about to follow.

My heart skipped a million beats.

“Noka came looking for you” she said finally.

I felt like punching someone.

“Noka did what?”

“How did he find me?”

“What does he want?” I asked angrily.

I was pacing up and down now.

“He just appeared with his oyinbo mother”

“I asked who he was and he introduced himself as Noka” she continued.

“He prostrated and was begging me with tears”.

“Your daughter witnessed the whole thing”

“She has not allowed me a moment of peace since then”.

I was in another world already – the world where I was planning a million ways to kill Noka if I ever lay my eyes on him. I was not going to allow that beast get close to my daughter. She’s mine and mine alone.

The doorbell jolted me out of my thought.

“Who the hell is that?” I blurted out angrily.

I dashed toward the door as if to give the person there a beating of his/her life. I could really be over dramatic when I was angry

I pulled the door opened and I was transfixed.

“Please kill me already” I thought.

Today is really going to be a long day.

“Good morning Jumoke” he said in his regular baritone voice.

“Hi” was the only thing I could manage to say.

Dapo Badejo was standing in front of me life and direct. I must be dreaming.




*NYSC – An acronym for National Youth Service Corps


Diary of a Jumoke: Episode IV

This is the 4th Episode of Abdulwahab Olajumoke’s “Diary of a Jumoke”. I am sorry for the belated post. It should have been published yesterday. Kindly read and let me know what you make of this episode in the comment section below. You can read Episode 1 here, Episode 2 here and Episode 3 here.b9565334-2a5d-4d71-9f13-c7c36d94dd7e

Soft bed, a lilac duvet and a man with traces of grey hair on his head was the first sight I took in when I opened my eyes.

At first, I couldn’t remember where I was but when my eyes fell on the scattered furniture in the room and my bra which was hanging on the door knob, the memory of the previous night came flooding back.

I had left Club 44 with Dr Bassey after he led me to his Limousine and ordered one of the most expensive champagne. I had giving him a very exquisite lap dance and by the time I was through, I discovered he was as hard as a rock.

He told the driver to take us to the hotel where he was staying and on our way I had added to the fun by giving him a blowjob he would not forget in a decade. He came in my mouth like a tsunami and I could see the pleasant shock in his eyes. Dude has never experienced anything like that ever in his life. I was proud of myself and my skills.

Never did I know that he was still caging his killer sex spirit. I was going to get the surprise of my life later that night.

We entered his suite and he called room service to bring us our meal. I had ordered almost half of the food on the menu,i was starving already. He had also ordered a plate of wheat meal.

He was engaged in some series of phone calls to his business partners while I chosed to freshen up. The food was ready by the time I entered the room wearing nothing but my bra and thongs.

I could see the greedy look in his eyes as he took in my body.

“You have a nice body.” he had commented and I replied with a thank you and placed a kiss on his lips. I could feel the alcohol in my system. I was slightly tipsy from the champagne I had taken earlier. I wanted him to do things to my body already, but first I needed to eat.

Everything about this man displayed elegance, even the way he eats. I was impressed as I watched him transport his meal with easy strides from the plate to his mouth. He caught me staring and he smiled.

“Please eat your food dear.” he added in perfectly accented English.

We were through with eating within few minutes and he excused himself. He said he needed to take his bath. I got on the soft bed and picked my phone. I had loads of unread instant messages.

My mentions on Twitter were the highest. Hian! What is it with Twitter Nigeria and silly banters? If I had known, I wouldn’t have joined this Linda Ikeji and Wizkid’s fight. Everybody is trying to seek attention in their own ways. I don’t have time for that biko. Everyone knows I hate Wizkid though.

I was so engrossed with my phone that I did not notice when Dr Bassey entered the room. I was lying on my tummy and I guessed the sight of my bum must have turned him on.

The way he grabbed my booty from behind made me shiver with pleasure; before I knew what was happening he had torn my thongs off with the speed of light.

Pinning me to the bed, he trailed his hand through the inside of my thighs like a pro. Dammmmnn!!! The pleasure I felt was too much to describe.

The tickling sensation was tantalizing as he worked his hand in and out of my wet honeypot. Watching me with a masculine smile as my leg vibrated with each thrust, I was moaning as loud as my voice box could allow me.

If the occupant in the next apartment were listening I was sure they would have heard the Shiiiiit, ahhhh, ohhhh, yeah babyyy! I was screaming, urging him to do more.

When he saw that I was close to exploding. He guided me over to the chair and instantly I got down as low as my back could allow, giving him unrestricted access. He plunged into me with force like a plumber trying to dig a borehole.

I could swear that I felt his dick stretched from my honeypot into my throat. But again, I could just be exaggerating.

I was surprised by his length. I was not expecting to see that kind of “weapon of mass destruction” on a man of his age. I climaxed few minutes later and he did too.

I crashed on the bed immediately because all my strength had been drained by Oga Spartacus. I didn’t know when I slept off.

It seems he carried me from where I was because when I woke up, a pillow was propped under my head and a huge duvet covered my naked body.

I got out of bed to take my shower. When I came back, Dr Bassey was already awake.

“Good morning sunshine. I hope you slept well” he said.

“Good morning Doctor” I replied

“Please call me Mike” he added.

Then he told me he would be having a meeting very early that morning and that I was free to go home for a while. He also said his chauffer was waiting down stairs to take me any where I wanted to go.

Few minutes later, I was fully dressed and ready to go. Mike handed me fifty thousand naira in cash. I mouthed a quick thank you and hugged him before I left the room.

His chauffer was waiting as he had told me. The journey to my house didn’t take long. The SUV moved as swift as a bird.

I got down in front of the green gate leading to my compound and walked with gentle strides towards my flat.

I was still slightly tired and I needed to sleep.

I concluded that Shade was around because I could hear voices inside my flat. The door was opened and I let myself in, heading straight to my room.

“Mummmmmmmmy” I heard a tiny voice call out.

I turned around and I saw Arianna my daughter staring at me with her blue eyes.

“What the hell was she doing here?” I thought as I enveloped her tiny body in a bear hug and called out to Shade.


*biko – an Igbo word for please

@kodili_nduka : “I am proud that a Nigerian wrote Guardians of the Seal”

On September 02, 2016, I announced the winner of my giveaway of Tunde Leye’s newest book, Guardians of the Seal. Kodili Nduka won it. You can read the announcement here. Like I said in the post, it was a tough call to make as I also liked Seyi Adeoye’s entry. The singular determining reason I picked Kodili was because she promised to review the book after reading. So, the book was mailed to her and she has sent in her review. It is a short, but quite interesting review. She made me want to go read the book all over again. Her review reminds me of something I said to Tunde Leye when I went over to his office to collect my advance copy of the book. I told him, my greatest wish is to see the book being adapted into a movie – a Hollywood produced movie. The plot was just so un-Nigerian. You could think you were “watching” a Harry Porter movie whilst reading the book. The metal images forming in my head as I read the book were just too real. My reaction to the book is in tandem with Kodili’s conclusion: I am proud that the book is written by a Nigerian. You can find Kodili’s review below after the image.



It is an interesting book! I noticed the following whilst reading:

  1. You can tell a lot of thought went into it to make sure the story fit together and blended somewhat with what we already know about some of the characters. E.g. pg 11, when Lucifer visited the garden of Eden, it was mentioned that he transformed to his pre-rebellion form because his present demon form would have been repelled by the nature of God…. Also, I liked that he noted that the demons had no love for each other and would cheer when one of them gets into trouble. That’s why they’re evil. Lol. Also, giving Gulliam the worst punishment despite the correct gist he brought was so unfair. Guess that’s why he’s the devil! The eni and eji transformation was cool too.
  2. I liked his use of words e.g. pg 8 where he mentioned that the formerly high-ranking demons retained the annoying habit of ‘speaking in circles’. Lol, I could visualize that scene.
  3. I liked the stones at the top of each new sub-story (I don’t know what to call it).
  4. The way he described the story around the Garden of Eden at the beginning of the book and filled in those parts that are “missing” from the Bible makes it so believable. Also, the book’s explanation of the role of the guardians and archangels is something I could tell my child. Though I’m not happy he didn’t talk about Angel Raphael.
  5. I noticed some typos e.g pg 65, the last word on line 19 should be ‘here’ not ‘her’; pg 158, line 23, I think it should be ‘cut off by’. From pg 95 to the end of the book, there’s a different font…I don’t know if it was intentional. Sometimes he used Lex instead of Alex…don’t know if that was intentional too but it was confusing at times.

In summary, I felt proud that a Nigerian wrote this kind of book. The book made me think about man’s relationship with God and raised some questions e.g. why did God allow Lucifer to distort the perfect life in the Garden of Eden? Surely he must have known that Lucifer would visit Adam and Eve and try to do something mischievous. Also, I feel if the book is modified just a little, it could be a good story book for kids as the fighting, magic, etc. would generate excitement.




Have you read the book? What do you make of it?

You have not read the book? Here is a link on how and where to get/buy it: https://tlsplace.wordpress.com/2016/09/26/where-to-buy-guardians-of-the-seal/



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